The poo & guff thread...

[markysimmo]

I'm actually slightly gutted at the lack of farts from myself over the past few days

 

[markysimmo]

M & S Tuscan Sausage Penne !!!

This stuff is dynamite, had it for lunch and have literally not stopped farting, a torrent of loud trumps, including one at the top of the train station stairwell and I carried it down 3 flights of stairs with me

 

[Danishfurniturelover]

I farted in a lift today and you should have seen the look on the pretty young thing infront give me when she turned round, haha I just shrugged my shoulders.

Been taking a lot of naproxen recently for my achilles and it is having an effect.

 

[Dayo]

I went to the toilet yesterday for the first time in two days. I don't know how to describe it other than it felt like my stomach was being vacuum packed.
As the turd was exiting it felt like my stomach was touching my spine.
It reminded me of when you suck the air out of an empty 2 litre bottle of lemonade.

 

[GlennGoddle]

Got the beer $hits this morning. Balloon knot on fire

 

[markysimmo]

I literally think the person in the trap next to me at work just then has lost his entire stomach content !!

Pan farts of justice hahah

 

[markysimmo]

I was cycling home tonight and let off a massive fart as I was cycling past three coppers standing doing nothing as usual

fudge you feds !!!

 

[markysimmo]

If real, incredible !!!

 

[7percent]

I hate bogs that take an age to refill. My mate's got one and there's one at work.

You lay a massive cable, maybe wipe once or twice. You recognise that the bowl is at a critical level and that the current load is pushing the capacity of the toilet. So rather than risk blocking the toilet with your epic turd and assorted paper you flush.

You still need to finish wiping away all the brick from your crevice though, so you have to wait about 20 minutes for the cistern to refill to a high enough level to take the bricky paper down.

it's even worse if you get a second wave and release you need to go again.

 

[Mr_B]

If real, incredible !!!

good effort but wouldn't get into the top 20 on ratemypoo.com

 

[paxtonwolf]

If real, incredible !!!

Jesus tonight. Can elephants use public toilets?

 

[johnola]

Is that blood? If that had extruded from me there would have been prayers.

 

[markysimmo]

In my time on this planet I have never farted as eggy as today, it's horrendous

 

[PochettinoPochettinoPochettino]

I've indented my new work chair with my farts today. When everyone goes home I may well sniff my chair.

 

[markysimmo]

I've indented my new work chair with my farts today. When everyone goes home I may well sniff my chair.

Deep foamers !!

I must do 50 a day on the train, I reckon people will be sitting down 3 weeks later and be like wow what is that aroma

 

[PochettinoPochettinoPochettino]

Haha I must have smelt those bad boys! You're a Colchester train dude right?


Sitting on my porcelain throne using glory-glory.co.uk mobile app

 

[El Dante]

Definitely Ring of Fire day today for me after an extra chilli spicy hot pizza last night.

 

[scaramanga]

M & S Tuscan Sausage Penne !!!

This stuff is dynamite, had it for lunch and have literally not stopped farting, a torrent of loud trumps, including one at the top of the train station stairwell and I carried it down 3 flights of stairs with me

Amateur. Always fart up the stairs so you leave it at nose height for those following.

 

[markysimmo]

My farts are so eggy and loud tonight I think I'll be sleeping in the other room, my missus is not impressed

 

[paxtonwolf]

This thread still puts a smile on my face every time I read through it