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The poo & guff thread...

Amazing what a smelly poo can do. Had I the choice, I would put up with the smell rather than wait 15 more hours, unless the pilot was at risk of passing out from the pungent crap fumes that is
 
Let one slip out today when getting a coffee mid morning. I vacated the vicinity without suspicion, and luckily I had some valuable seconds before the GHod awful scent took hold. Made me laugh when I overheard people talking about the stink bomb-esque smell that lingered and who they suspected of it. They seem to think it was an older lady who was seen leaving the scene of the crime as the smell set in. Looks like I got away with it this time
 
Have been dropping bean/coffee smelling farts all day, can't shake them. Absolutely rank and will need to burn my trousers tonight.
 
THFC said:
Have been dropping bean/coffee smelling farts all day, can't shake them. Absolutely rank and will need to burn my trousers tonight.
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seems you get a lot of wind ;)

I let one go in the office the other day. I sneezed unexpectedly and it popped. Was a shot sharp shrill. The office was quiet at the time and I heard several people say in shock "what was that". Very embarrassing.
 
On my journey home from Liverpool St to Colchester I probably set a world record for doing the most amount of farts in a 50 minute train journey
 
I just had probably one of the worst but best poos of my life.

Watching a film with the Mrs and her mate and told them I'm just going to the toilet carry on without me but they paused it for me. Ran upstairs and literally had the worst pain of my life whilst having a dump. Wanted to be sick at the same time and at one point didn't think I was actually going to make it back alive.

But, the relief when it was all over was immense and the pain and aching was all worth it for how great I feel now.....
 
I always need to go when working night shifts, and it's always the messy ones that come when at work! No one-wipers, ohh noo! It's always the worst sticky, smearing ones! Add to that, the so called toilet paper supplied at the office is of the type "Chuck Norris toilet paper". Takes crap from no-one!
 
GinolaGinolaGinola said:
weirdly everything went back to normal. must have been my housemates coriander spice dip, she loves spicy food...
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I would say those pains are certainly 'wind related' and thus in your case appear to have relieved when the pressure grew so great that the turds were forced out at high speed from the gassy build-up. Glad all is back to normal. For the record, I checked the captain's log post-push today and
a) considered there had to be at least 3lbs in there and
b) marveled at how full of brick i really am!
 
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