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Does anyone suffer from mental illness on here?

GinolaGinolaGinola said:
Day after always is bad but my wife is very reasonable and knows I have a problem when I drink. She’s been understanding today and held my hand when we were walking by the pool. My son smiled at me when I went to the pool as he saw me, as I stayed back in our room for a couple of hours more kip. Just fed him in the restaurant now and it’s such a nice feeling. Strangers smiling at him as he is s such a cutey. I don’t want to let them down so today is the start of a new day and new me.

Thanks for all responses, can talk to you lot so easily on here.
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OK, time for some tough love. You, just like me, get crazy when you drink, so stop. All of the serious trouble I ever got into was drink related, all the stupid stuff, the brawls, the insults flung at my wife and others, the motorcycle accident, the illicit sex, the cocaine, was all because, just like you I could go a week without drinking and then end up in a pub and bam!

You have identified the problem, just like I did, so make a decision and stick to it. I avoid social situations where there is a possibility I might drink and cause mayhem, as the end result is just not worth the pleasure. The alternative for me was to terrible to contemplate, losing my wife and son wasn't happening. I was 38 when I became a dad and it was time for the hell raising to stop

I've been there dude, and I feel your pain I truly do, BUT this is within your grasp to sort out. I did it when my son was born, he's now 15 and a fine young man his dad can be proud of. I want him to be able to be proud of me, he has never seen me drunk, and I never want him too. Today is the beginning of the rest of your life. Please use it wisely. I would finally add that theses days I am very lucky to be able to enjoy the odd drink in the house and keep a lid on it.
Hopefully you will reach that point. Good luck! no judgement, just good wishes and encouragement. You CAN do this. PM me if you wish
 
Yermiyahu said:
OK, time for some tough love. You, just like me, get crazy when you drink, so stop. All of the serious trouble I ever got into was drink related, all the stupid stuff, the brawls, the insults flung at my wife and others, the motorcycle accident, the illicit sex, the cocaine, was all because, just like you I could go a week without drinking and then end up in a pub and bam!

You have identified the problem, just like I did, so make a decision and stick to it. I avoid social situations where there is a possibility I might drink and cause mayhem, as the end result is just not worth the pleasure. The alternative for me was to terrible to contemplate, losing my wife and son wasn't happening. I was 38 when I became a dad and it was time for the hell raising to stop

I've been there dude, and I feel your pain I truly do, BUT this is within your grasp to sort out. I did it when my son was born, he's now 15 and a fine young man his dad can be proud of. I want him to be able to be proud of me, he has never seen me drunk, and I never want him too. Today is the beginning of the rest of your life. Please use it wisely. I would finally add that theses days I am very lucky to be able to enjoy the odd drink in the house and keep a lid on it.
Hopefully you will reach that point. Good luck! no judgement, just good wishes and encouragement. You CAN do this. PM me if you wish
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That’s good to hear mate. Your antics you got up to sound very similar to mine when I drink. I’m a social hand grenade when I drink and I’m a loose cannon. It’s going to be bloody hard as my mates and spurs boys love a drink.
Work is pretty sociable too but I think I’m just going to swerve the events now. I’m 35 and had enough nights out, time to settle down properly. Very good advice.
 
GinolaGinolaGinola said:
That’s good to hear mate. Your antics you got up to sound very similar to mine when I drink. I’m a social hand grenade when I drink and I’m a loose cannon. It’s going to be bloody hard as my mates and spurs boys love a drink.
Work is pretty sociable too but I think I’m just going to swerve the events now. I’m 35 and had enough nights out, time to settle down properly. Very good advice.
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Swerve events, get a hobby that doesn't involve Alcohol ( hard I know) and spend as much time as you can being a dad. Your kid will remember a great guy instead of a hell raiser! Editd to add a lot of my mates had to be sat down and explained that I wouldn't be around Spurs so much or attending lads nights out. Ultimately we moved to a small beach town in Florida, which whilst boring allowed me to focus on healing.
 
I would add, it is worth working out what your motivation is to drink. Is it your current situation, your Mrs? Your job? Or is it something further back that is too painful to deal with.

Whatever t is, it is a painful reoccurring cycle (bit like our semi finals), one you probably know has no redeeming features. I can't remember if you've sort help before but as @Yermiyahu states you can do and NOW is the time. You have brought a little one into this world and I hope you feel what everyone feels at that time ie you are no longer the most important thing on this earth.

He is the motivator and the benefit for your Mrs will be massive as well. Bringing up kids is hard, I've had plenty of mates whose dad's were drinkers and it made family life basically sh!t. Plus it's so old school, look at this thread, we're the new modern males, we can talk about and we (you) can sort it out. Stay strong and enjoy the sunshine :)
 
Yermiyahu said:
OK, time for some tough love. You, just like me, get crazy when you drink, so stop. All of the serious trouble I ever got into was drink related, all the stupid stuff, the brawls, the insults flung at my wife and others, the motorcycle accident, the illicit sex, the cocaine, was all because, just like you I could go a week without drinking and then end up in a pub and bam!

You have identified the problem, just like I did, so make a decision and stick to it. I avoid social situations where there is a possibility I might drink and cause mayhem, as the end result is just not worth the pleasure. The alternative for me was to terrible to contemplate, losing my wife and son wasn't happening. I was 38 when I became a dad and it was time for the hell raising to stop

I've been there dude, and I feel your pain I truly do, BUT this is within your grasp to sort out. I did it when my son was born, he's now 15 and a fine young man his dad can be proud of. I want him to be able to be proud of me, he has never seen me drunk, and I never want him too. Today is the beginning of the rest of your life. Please use it wisely. I would finally add that theses days I am very lucky to be able to enjoy the odd drink in the house and keep a lid on it.
Hopefully you will reach that point. Good luck! no judgement, just good wishes and encouragement. You CAN do this. PM me if you wish
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Great post. At the end of the day most of us are selfish and indulge ourselves, its fine when we are single but once we bring kids into the world then the selfishness has to stop.

Tough love is spot on, do i take another drink or do i go and cuddle my kid, some folks can handle both but if there is a problem doing that then there is only on answer.
 
Yes all of you are right. Time to stop being selfish and put him and my wife first. Not me which is exactly what I’m doing. I feel like I want to let out a big cry right now. I know it’s the depression of the alcohol and tomorrow I’ll feel better but I still feel I’ve let my family down.

Enough of the feeling sorry for myself though. Got to do this otherwise as my wife says I’ll keep going round in circles and she will think enough is enough.
 
Some good advice there from @Yermlyahu, find a hobby, one that you can share with your son. Something you learn and appreciate together, these are what make old age and life in general worth while.
 
GinolaGinolaGinola said:
Yes all of you are right. Time to stop being selfish and put him and my wife first. Not me which is exactly what I’m doing. I feel like I want to let out a big cry right now. I know it’s the depression of the alcohol and tomorrow I’ll feel better but I still feel I’ve let my family down.

Enough of the feeling sorry for myself though. Got to do this otherwise as my wife says I’ll keep going round in circles and she will think enough is enough.
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Have you tried yoga or pilates? it is like meditation, good to learn how to focus and be in one moment. Helps when you feeling yourself give into cravings and desires, helps improve your resistance and strength of mind.
 
GinolaGinolaGinola said:
Day after always is bad but my wife is very reasonable and knows I have a problem when I drink. She’s been understanding today and held my hand when we were walking by the pool. My son smiled at me when I went to the pool as he saw me, as I stayed back in our room for a couple of hours more kip. Just fed him in the restaurant now and it’s such a nice feeling. Strangers smiling at him as he is s such a cutey. I don’t want to let them down so today is the start of a new day and new me.

Thanks for all responses, can talk to you lot so easily on here.
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Well done on today, and as many have said - take it one day at a time. COYGGG
 
Danishfurniturelover said:
Have you tried yoga or pilates? it is like meditation, good to learn how to focus and be in one moment. Helps when you feeling yourself give into cravings and desires, helps improve your resistance and strength of mind.
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No I haven’t but my brothers new girlfriend is a yoga teacher so could easily get into it. Not a bad idea that. Would definitely calm me down and help I think.
 
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