I am experiencing a close family member suffering with mental illness.
It's been diagnosed as a psychotic disorder a couple of years back, but there was a run up period of about three years when, looking back, it was clearly manifesting itself.
It began with thoughts of being bullied which were triggered by a stressful event. It continued with ever more detailed and eventually outlandish claims of persecution, stalking and the convoluted linking of events and people that would lead to obsessive thoughts and compulsions.
Eventually the illness expressed itself in full blown auditory and visual hallucinations and paranoid delusions. As a family we were aware of what was happening but didn't know how to deal with the situation. We tried to reassure, comfort and console but it's since become apparent to me that you cannot talk rationally to someone who is irrational. It's a different language. I cannot tell you how frightening it is to see and hear a loved one verbally and physically responding to a malevolent voice in their head.
After a brief disappearance and subsequently locking themselves in the house, we got to crisis point and they were sectioned and hospitalised. This lasted a few weeks and seemed to release the pressure, but the aftercare was almost non-existent so the spiral began again.
After another year of trying to head it off and trying to get help, we reached breaking point again. This time we avoided hospital on the pure technicality that the crisis came on a Friday night and the hospital mental health assessor (who is needed for sectioning) wasn't available.
However, the care was much better this time, with daily visits from the crisis team for weeks on end, and now, some months on, weekly appointments, variously with psychiatrists, psychologists and therapists. The close care and talking helps, as does the consistent taking of antipsychotic medication and an anti-anxiety drug.
I guess talking about it helps me. For a long time no-one knew but people suspected something was wrong. There's a catch 22 in needing help but wanting to respect someone's privacy. Since talking about it, friends and family have been very understanding. It probably filled in some blanks for them.
I would also say that if you recognise any of the symptoms I've mentioned in a loved one, seek help now, not later. It doesn't go away on its own. You can't talk them around. The longer it is left the higher the chance of permanent damage. Something like this is devastating for the person involved and to their relationships.
It's an extremely difficult subject to broach, not least because the sufferer often has no idea they are ill. They lack insight, and an 'accusation' of illness can very much play into their paranoia, making you an enemy and harming communication.
If you can't raise it like we couldn't, speak to your GP, any of the mental health charities or the sufferer's GP. Find a way to get the system involved. It will be difficult, but it's better than the alternative.
And if you find yourself classed as a carer, make sure you get help and support too.
Good luck to all those and their families who are experiencing mental illness.
