markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Clarke and Watson going really well in the last ODI, the Aussies will be looking to post a big big score
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The Cricket Thread
- Thread starter Mulletperm
- Start date
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Great throw er sorry delivery from Johnson then !!!!!
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Huge amount of empty seats the YB40 final today, probably stupidly priced
funster
Danny Murphy
So Tendulkar announces his retirement I see. Doesn't come as too much of a surprise I guess. Always looked likely he'd pack his bags after his 200th test. Still remember that match saving ton at OT on his first tour of England - not to mention the outrageous one handed catch he took! The way he flayed the Pakistan attack at the start of India's response in the World Cup in SA, having Shoaib withdrawn from the attack straight away! And I even got to see him have to bat tiwice in a day at Lord's... and get out twice in a day at Lord's!
An utter pleasure to have watched him play, and a shame he won't tour here next year.
An utter pleasure to have watched him play, and a shame he won't tour here next year.
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Xmas day in Melbourne sorted, should be a great crack, apparently 2 years ago the Aussie team were in the next room and the BA made so much noise they all had to move haha
Barmy Army Christmas Day Lunch at The Palladium Crown Casino
We are thrilled to announce that we are going back to the Palladium at the Crown Casino in Melbourne for our Barmy Army Lunch on Christmas Day.
We had a fantastic day there in 2010 and it was widely regarded as one of the best events that we have ever organised, the setting is one of the finest in Australia and it hosts many of their most glittering awards ceremonies and gala dinners including The Logies, for the Best Australian Actor, The Brownlow Medal for the best player in the AFL and the Allan Border Medal for the Outstanding Australian Cricketer of the Year.
The Function starts at midday with a Pre Event Drinks reception, followed by a 2 course set lunch of roast turkey and vegetables followed by a traditional plum pudding and custard dessert and coffee and most importantly includes 3.5 hours of unlimited drinks (yes unlimited drinks) including Crown Reserve Red and White Wines, Crown Reserve Sparkling, Pure Blonde and Cascade Premium Light beers whilst the children get unlimited soft drinks within the package.
Barmy Army Christmas Day Lunch at The Palladium Crown Casino
We are thrilled to announce that we are going back to the Palladium at the Crown Casino in Melbourne for our Barmy Army Lunch on Christmas Day.
We had a fantastic day there in 2010 and it was widely regarded as one of the best events that we have ever organised, the setting is one of the finest in Australia and it hosts many of their most glittering awards ceremonies and gala dinners including The Logies, for the Best Australian Actor, The Brownlow Medal for the best player in the AFL and the Allan Border Medal for the Outstanding Australian Cricketer of the Year.
The Function starts at midday with a Pre Event Drinks reception, followed by a 2 course set lunch of roast turkey and vegetables followed by a traditional plum pudding and custard dessert and coffee and most importantly includes 3.5 hours of unlimited drinks (yes unlimited drinks) including Crown Reserve Red and White Wines, Crown Reserve Sparkling, Pure Blonde and Cascade Premium Light beers whilst the children get unlimited soft drinks within the package.
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
England arrive in Perth in only 12 days time !!!!
England Test squad: Alastair Cook (Essex, captain), Joe Root (Yorkshire), Jonathan Trott (Warwickshire), Kevin Pietersen (Surrey), Ian Bell (Warwickshire), Gary Ballance (Yorkshire), Michael Carberry (Hampshire), Jonny Bairstow (Yorkshire), Ben Stokes (Durham), Matt Prior (Sussex, vice-captain), Stuart Broad (Nottinghamshire), Graeme Swann (Nottinghamshire), James Anderson (Lancashire), Monty Panesar (Sussex, on loan at Essex), Steven Finn (Middlesex), Boyd Rankin (Warwickshire), Chris Tremlett (Surrey).
October
25 England arrive in Perth
31-2 Nov v Western Australia XI, Perth (02:30 GMT)
November
6-9 v Australia A, Hobart (23:30 GMT, 5-8 Nov)
13-16 v New South Wales XI, Sydney (SCG) (23:30 GMT, 12-15 Nov)
21-25 1st Test, Brisbane (00:00 GMT)
29-30 v Chairman's XI, Alice Springs (23:30 GMT, 28-29 Nov)
December
5-9 2nd Test, Adelaide (00:00 GMT)
13-17 3rd Test. Perth (02:30 GMT)
26-30 4th Test, Melbourne (23:30 GMT, 26-29 Dec)
January
3-7 5th Test, Sydney (SCG) (23:30 GMT, 2-6 Jan)
12 1st ODI, Melbourne (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
14 v Prime Minister's XI, Canberra
17 2nd ODI, Brisbane (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
19 3rd ODI, Sydney (SCG) (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
24 4th ODI, Perth (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
26 5th ODI, Adelaide (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
29 1st Twenty20 international, Hobart (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
31 2nd Twenty20 international, Melbourne (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
February
2 3rd Twenty20 international, Sydney (Stadium Australia) (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
England Test squad: Alastair Cook (Essex, captain), Joe Root (Yorkshire), Jonathan Trott (Warwickshire), Kevin Pietersen (Surrey), Ian Bell (Warwickshire), Gary Ballance (Yorkshire), Michael Carberry (Hampshire), Jonny Bairstow (Yorkshire), Ben Stokes (Durham), Matt Prior (Sussex, vice-captain), Stuart Broad (Nottinghamshire), Graeme Swann (Nottinghamshire), James Anderson (Lancashire), Monty Panesar (Sussex, on loan at Essex), Steven Finn (Middlesex), Boyd Rankin (Warwickshire), Chris Tremlett (Surrey).
October
25 England arrive in Perth
31-2 Nov v Western Australia XI, Perth (02:30 GMT)
November
6-9 v Australia A, Hobart (23:30 GMT, 5-8 Nov)
13-16 v New South Wales XI, Sydney (SCG) (23:30 GMT, 12-15 Nov)
21-25 1st Test, Brisbane (00:00 GMT)
29-30 v Chairman's XI, Alice Springs (23:30 GMT, 28-29 Nov)
December
5-9 2nd Test, Adelaide (00:00 GMT)
13-17 3rd Test. Perth (02:30 GMT)
26-30 4th Test, Melbourne (23:30 GMT, 26-29 Dec)
January
3-7 5th Test, Sydney (SCG) (23:30 GMT, 2-6 Jan)
12 1st ODI, Melbourne (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
14 v Prime Minister's XI, Canberra
17 2nd ODI, Brisbane (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
19 3rd ODI, Sydney (SCG) (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
24 4th ODI, Perth (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
26 5th ODI, Adelaide (d/n) (03:20 GMT)
29 1st Twenty20 international, Hobart (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
31 2nd Twenty20 international, Melbourne (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
February
2 3rd Twenty20 international, Sydney (Stadium Australia) (d/n) (08:35 GMT)
awesome dawson
Mitchell Thomas
Getting close isn't it. Hope they're training well.
Weather has been terrible recently in Melbourne. Baking hot in Sydney. The MCG is looking mighty fine though out my office window.
Weather has been terrible recently in Melbourne. Baking hot in Sydney. The MCG is looking mighty fine though out my office window.
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Imagine what a downer it would be if you lost that test !!!!! ;-)
Seriously though, this series is going to be a corker, cant believe its less than a month away from the 1st test, glad weve got 3 decent warm up games first
Thebarbarian
Nicola Berti
Mate , Adelaide was a cracking ground in last ashes, one of the best tests I have seen . Back there in December for this test, hopefully the character of the ground is still there. If anyone else going then send me a message, happy to have a beer with a fellow yid
awesome dawson
Mitchell Thomas
Can't make it to Adelaide this time but the last two Ashes series have been great down there. Love the lunchtime pub sessions near the ground.
Just Melbourne and Sydney for me this time.
Just Melbourne and Sydney for me this time.
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
and I will be one of them, excited is an understatement !!!!
Cricket Australia says all available tickets for the opening day of the Dec. 26 Boxing Day test against England have been sold at the Melbourne Cricket Ground and the crowd could break a 52-year-old world record for single-day attendance.
The MCG's official capacity is 100,000, although without all the standing room seats being sold, it's about 98,000 to 99,000. The current attendance record for a single day is 90,800, also at the MCG, during a West Indies test against Australia in 1961.
The first match of this year's five-test Ashes series begins Nov. 21 in Brisbane. England is attempting to win a fourth straight series.
Cricket Australia says all available tickets for the opening day of the Dec. 26 Boxing Day test against England have been sold at the Melbourne Cricket Ground and the crowd could break a 52-year-old world record for single-day attendance.
The MCG's official capacity is 100,000, although without all the standing room seats being sold, it's about 98,000 to 99,000. The current attendance record for a single day is 90,800, also at the MCG, during a West Indies test against Australia in 1961.
The first match of this year's five-test Ashes series begins Nov. 21 in Brisbane. England is attempting to win a fourth straight series.
Thebarbarian
Nicola Berti
Mate, Adelaide sold out first 4 days, Melbourne 3 days , Perth 3 days , brisbane 95% first 4 days . Sydney ..... . . .? They don't think it will get to that test !!
Going to be a cracker, the Aussies are not as bad as they make out, the English are better than they are showing ( trott ton in the warm up bodes well ) , I reckon it might come down to the wire .
Only good thing Mitchell Johnson just called back from India to prepare for first test
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Rohit Sharma might have felt the need to compensate his team and the crowd for running out Virat Kohli, the hottest batting talent in India at the moment, for a duck. He did so by hitting 16 sixes, a world record for an ODI innings, powering to a double-century, the third in one-day cricket and all of them by Indian batsmen, and setting Australia a target of 384 to win the seven-match series in Bangalore. Compensate he did, indeed.
Rohit and MS Dhoni plundered 167 runs off 94 balls for the fifth wicket. India scored 151 runs in the last ten overs, of which 101 came in the last five. Rohit had gone past 100 off 114 balls. He had been dropped on 120. And then he went past 200 off 156 deliveries. The easy-paced pitch, the shortness of the Chinnaswamy Stadium's boundaries, the waywardness of Australia's seamers, the absence of Mitchell Johnson and the injury to Shane Watson were factors that gave Rohit the perfect stage, and he played the perfect innings, resplendent for the grace and smoothness of his strokes.
As ball after ball sped off Rohit's bat to and over the boundary, it was difficult to recall that he had been the supporting act during his sixth century stand in 19 innings with Shikhar Dhawan, their third such opening partnership of this series. And that he had to overcome a testing period, when Dhawan was trapped lbw in the 19th over and Kohli run out in the 20th.
Before those wickets, Rohit had got going by cutting wide balls from James Faulkner, both shots dripping with elegance, the second bringing up the fifty stand in 6.2 overs. He also hit the innings' first six, driving a full offering from Faulkner over the wide long-off boundary. It was Dhawan, however, who had infused the innings with momentum, punishing Clint McKay and Nathan Coulter-Nile for bowling on both sides of the wicket by flicking and cover-driving for three boundaries in an over. He reached his half-century off 43 balls and then took India past 100 in 15.1 overs.
Shortly after that, the capricious Bangalore weather forced the players off the field for 30 minutes, and soon after that India lost their first two wickets.
For a few overs, Rohit and Suresh Raina batted circumspectly. Only for a few. In the 26th, Rohit stepped out to launch Glenn Maxwell's offbreak over the wide long-on boundary. In the 28th, he came out twice to loft Xavier Doherty against the turn over the leg-side boundary. His six count was four.
Australia's captain George Bailey, his relief at Kohli's dismissal swiftly fading, brought Watson back for the 29th over, only to watch his bowler pull up as he approached his delivery stride. His hamstring sore, Watson trudged off the field. Back came Maxwell, and Rohit continued his feast, sending balls into the crowd at long-on and midwicket.
India lost Raina and Yuvraj Singh, who scored only 19 in four innings this series, in quick succession too, but Rohit was not fazed. Firmly in six-hitting stride and his fourth century achieved, Rohit pulled Faulkner flat and fast towards deep square leg, where the substitute Moises Henriques positioned himself to take the catch but only parried the ball for another six.
India were only 232 after 40 overs, but Australia's seamers finished like they had begun, with no control over lines and lengths, making life impossible for their captain, who could only deploy four boundary riders. Rohit drove imperiously, through and over the field at cover, and pulled and flicked too. His smooth stroke-play was in contrast with Dhoni's more brutal blows, including a helicoptered six that flew over the roof at long-on.
At the start of the 46th over, Rohit was on 142, and he punished McKay for two fours and a six as 16 runs came off it. A despondent Bailey turned to Doherty for the next over and after Rohit hit him for three sixes and two fours, a double-century was realistically achievable for the first time.
He got there by driving a length ball - the first of the 50th over from McKay - clean over the cover boundary. Rohit was not done; another record was in sight. The next ball was was fuller and straighter. Rohit flicked and watched it fly into the stands for his 16th six
Rohit and MS Dhoni plundered 167 runs off 94 balls for the fifth wicket. India scored 151 runs in the last ten overs, of which 101 came in the last five. Rohit had gone past 100 off 114 balls. He had been dropped on 120. And then he went past 200 off 156 deliveries. The easy-paced pitch, the shortness of the Chinnaswamy Stadium's boundaries, the waywardness of Australia's seamers, the absence of Mitchell Johnson and the injury to Shane Watson were factors that gave Rohit the perfect stage, and he played the perfect innings, resplendent for the grace and smoothness of his strokes.
As ball after ball sped off Rohit's bat to and over the boundary, it was difficult to recall that he had been the supporting act during his sixth century stand in 19 innings with Shikhar Dhawan, their third such opening partnership of this series. And that he had to overcome a testing period, when Dhawan was trapped lbw in the 19th over and Kohli run out in the 20th.
Before those wickets, Rohit had got going by cutting wide balls from James Faulkner, both shots dripping with elegance, the second bringing up the fifty stand in 6.2 overs. He also hit the innings' first six, driving a full offering from Faulkner over the wide long-off boundary. It was Dhawan, however, who had infused the innings with momentum, punishing Clint McKay and Nathan Coulter-Nile for bowling on both sides of the wicket by flicking and cover-driving for three boundaries in an over. He reached his half-century off 43 balls and then took India past 100 in 15.1 overs.
Shortly after that, the capricious Bangalore weather forced the players off the field for 30 minutes, and soon after that India lost their first two wickets.
For a few overs, Rohit and Suresh Raina batted circumspectly. Only for a few. In the 26th, Rohit stepped out to launch Glenn Maxwell's offbreak over the wide long-on boundary. In the 28th, he came out twice to loft Xavier Doherty against the turn over the leg-side boundary. His six count was four.
Australia's captain George Bailey, his relief at Kohli's dismissal swiftly fading, brought Watson back for the 29th over, only to watch his bowler pull up as he approached his delivery stride. His hamstring sore, Watson trudged off the field. Back came Maxwell, and Rohit continued his feast, sending balls into the crowd at long-on and midwicket.
India lost Raina and Yuvraj Singh, who scored only 19 in four innings this series, in quick succession too, but Rohit was not fazed. Firmly in six-hitting stride and his fourth century achieved, Rohit pulled Faulkner flat and fast towards deep square leg, where the substitute Moises Henriques positioned himself to take the catch but only parried the ball for another six.
India were only 232 after 40 overs, but Australia's seamers finished like they had begun, with no control over lines and lengths, making life impossible for their captain, who could only deploy four boundary riders. Rohit drove imperiously, through and over the field at cover, and pulled and flicked too. His smooth stroke-play was in contrast with Dhoni's more brutal blows, including a helicoptered six that flew over the roof at long-on.
At the start of the 46th over, Rohit was on 142, and he punished McKay for two fours and a six as 16 runs came off it. A despondent Bailey turned to Doherty for the next over and after Rohit hit him for three sixes and two fours, a double-century was realistically achievable for the first time.
He got there by driving a length ball - the first of the 50th over from McKay - clean over the cover boundary. Rohit was not done; another record was in sight. The next ball was was fuller and straighter. Rohit flicked and watched it fly into the stands for his 16th six
K.D.D.D.D.Soc
Ian Walker
Wish I was out there. I got 100% record watching in Oz. Went to Sydney 2002 saw our only win. Aussies were a load of moaning losers.
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
I see the fat **** is at it again !!! this bloke is a complete bell-end, Clarek the best captain in the world, yeh course mate thats why the Aussies have lost 7 out of the last 9 test matches hahahaha
Shane Warne has returned to the attack after his autumn break with renewed vigour, claiming England will lose the series that starts in Brisbane on Nov 21 if Alastair Cook continues to captain the same way.
Warne tossed up a couple of readable leg-breaks before fizzing through his slider. “I think Australia can win the series,” he said.
“I think England have to play the best cricket they can possibly play to win. If they don’t play as well as they can, I think Australia will win the series.” Then Warne’s slider.
“I think Alastair Cook needs to be more imaginative. If Australia play well and he continues to captain the way he does, I think they are going to lose the series.
“I don’t think he can captain like that – and I’m not working in any capacity whatsoever for Cricket Australia. Darren Lehmann is a good mate of mine, and Michael Clarke is my best friend, of course I speak to them a lot but I call it as I see it. And I’m not the only one who thinks Alastair Cook is a negative captain.
“He lets the game drift. He waits for the game to come to him. If I look at the best captains, Stephen Fleming of New Zealand was a wonderful proactive captain and got the best out of his team, and the current New Zealand side under Brendon McCullum does well because he’s a good captain and makes you think – he’s ahead of the game.
“Michael Clarke, to me, is the best captain in the world at the moment. The fields he came up with for Jonathan Trott and Alastair Cook – Alastair Cook would never have a bat-pad, leg-slip and leg gully. He’s not pro-active.
“If England have a good day [in the field] it’s because of quality bowling. And if you’re playing the best sides in the world under pressure it [unimaginative captaincy] won’t hold up. Hopefully he will grow into the role and become more imaginative.”
But Warne was just as ready to criticise Australia’s last captain as England’s current one, after the publication of Ricky Ponting’s latest book.
“I know he beats himself up mercilessly about being the only captain ever in Australian history to lose three Ashes series,” he said.
“But to bring up the stuff about Pup [Michael Clarke], maybe it was a bit of jealousy because Pup was batting so well and Ponting just hung in there the last few years. To me, Michael is very well respected in the dressing room. To air all this in a book is pretty ordinary actually.”
When Warne was playing, his mastery of propaganda played a part in his becoming the greatest spinner of all time, and you wonder occasionally if a little lingers on. He said of England’s selection: “I think they’ve really missed a trick in not picking [Graham] Onions.”
If James Anderson breaks down, however, Onions is only a flight away in South Africa.
Yet Warne’s assessment of the best Australian team for the forthcoming Ashes seems typically shrewd — and so too his assessment of what the England team should be. What makes Warne’s analysis even more credible is that he is prepared to admit a mistake.
“I put my hand up to say I was wrong about George Bailey, and it’s fantastic to see the form he’s in,” Warne said of Australia’s T20 and one-day captain. “He has to be in the top six.”
Warne is also very shrewd in seeing the evolving role of Mitchell Johnson, who put a rocket up England’s batsmen in the one-day series which Australia won 2-1 at the Ageas Bowl in September.
“The pace he’s bowling at the moment, he looks really awkward. I think if Michael Clarke uses him the right way, he could be a real impact-type bowler rather than the leader of the attack.
“With the experience of Ryan Harris and Peter Siddle, Mitchell is a nice foil, and it’s a pretty good attack with Watson as fourth seamer.
“If I was picking the England side, I’d actually open with Michael Carberry and put Joe Root down to No 6. With Prior at seven that’s a very strong middle order, and looks stronger than Root at the top with Bairstow or one of the other guys at No 6.
“I don’t think Root’s an opener because of his technique. You can’t hang back like that and get stuck in the crease in Australia because of the pace of the wickets. He’s a good player of spinners and perfectly suited to No 6, and in time he can go up to No 4 and be the main man there. It could be crucifying him if he has got to face Siddle, Johnson and Harris on fast and bouncy pitches – he’s going to nick off a lot.
“For Australian conditions, I think Carberry is better suited than Root to opening. It’s also a better balanced side with Root at six rather than a struggling Bairstow.”
Warne might be evincing a bias towards his former county of Hampshire when he pushes Chris Tremlett to be England’s third seamer — “Rankin’s a bit raw and I don’t think Finn’s confidence is up after all his run-up issues” — but not when analysing Kevin Pietersen.
“You know he’s going to come out hard and play all his shots. When you’ve got the great players like Brian Lara and Sachin Tendulkar, you’ve just got to work hard on getting them under their average. If they don’t let him [Pietersen] get a hundred in the series, they’ll have done a pretty good job.”
So how would the greatest of all spinners, with the most astute cricket brain, bowl at Pietersen in the next two months — supposing he were to come out of retirement?
“I’d challenge him with spin when he first walks in and play on that bit of ego, and see if he wants to go downtown early.”
It is a fascinating prospect on two counts. First, if Pietersen goes downtown early, he might bump into Warne, still there from the night before.
Second, whereas everyone knew what the result of the last Ashes series was going to be, nobody can be sure this time
Shane Warne has returned to the attack after his autumn break with renewed vigour, claiming England will lose the series that starts in Brisbane on Nov 21 if Alastair Cook continues to captain the same way.
Warne tossed up a couple of readable leg-breaks before fizzing through his slider. “I think Australia can win the series,” he said.
“I think England have to play the best cricket they can possibly play to win. If they don’t play as well as they can, I think Australia will win the series.” Then Warne’s slider.
“I think Alastair Cook needs to be more imaginative. If Australia play well and he continues to captain the way he does, I think they are going to lose the series.
“I don’t think he can captain like that – and I’m not working in any capacity whatsoever for Cricket Australia. Darren Lehmann is a good mate of mine, and Michael Clarke is my best friend, of course I speak to them a lot but I call it as I see it. And I’m not the only one who thinks Alastair Cook is a negative captain.
“He lets the game drift. He waits for the game to come to him. If I look at the best captains, Stephen Fleming of New Zealand was a wonderful proactive captain and got the best out of his team, and the current New Zealand side under Brendon McCullum does well because he’s a good captain and makes you think – he’s ahead of the game.
“Michael Clarke, to me, is the best captain in the world at the moment. The fields he came up with for Jonathan Trott and Alastair Cook – Alastair Cook would never have a bat-pad, leg-slip and leg gully. He’s not pro-active.
“If England have a good day [in the field] it’s because of quality bowling. And if you’re playing the best sides in the world under pressure it [unimaginative captaincy] won’t hold up. Hopefully he will grow into the role and become more imaginative.”
But Warne was just as ready to criticise Australia’s last captain as England’s current one, after the publication of Ricky Ponting’s latest book.
“I know he beats himself up mercilessly about being the only captain ever in Australian history to lose three Ashes series,” he said.
“But to bring up the stuff about Pup [Michael Clarke], maybe it was a bit of jealousy because Pup was batting so well and Ponting just hung in there the last few years. To me, Michael is very well respected in the dressing room. To air all this in a book is pretty ordinary actually.”
When Warne was playing, his mastery of propaganda played a part in his becoming the greatest spinner of all time, and you wonder occasionally if a little lingers on. He said of England’s selection: “I think they’ve really missed a trick in not picking [Graham] Onions.”
If James Anderson breaks down, however, Onions is only a flight away in South Africa.
Yet Warne’s assessment of the best Australian team for the forthcoming Ashes seems typically shrewd — and so too his assessment of what the England team should be. What makes Warne’s analysis even more credible is that he is prepared to admit a mistake.
“I put my hand up to say I was wrong about George Bailey, and it’s fantastic to see the form he’s in,” Warne said of Australia’s T20 and one-day captain. “He has to be in the top six.”
Warne is also very shrewd in seeing the evolving role of Mitchell Johnson, who put a rocket up England’s batsmen in the one-day series which Australia won 2-1 at the Ageas Bowl in September.
“The pace he’s bowling at the moment, he looks really awkward. I think if Michael Clarke uses him the right way, he could be a real impact-type bowler rather than the leader of the attack.
“With the experience of Ryan Harris and Peter Siddle, Mitchell is a nice foil, and it’s a pretty good attack with Watson as fourth seamer.
“If I was picking the England side, I’d actually open with Michael Carberry and put Joe Root down to No 6. With Prior at seven that’s a very strong middle order, and looks stronger than Root at the top with Bairstow or one of the other guys at No 6.
“I don’t think Root’s an opener because of his technique. You can’t hang back like that and get stuck in the crease in Australia because of the pace of the wickets. He’s a good player of spinners and perfectly suited to No 6, and in time he can go up to No 4 and be the main man there. It could be crucifying him if he has got to face Siddle, Johnson and Harris on fast and bouncy pitches – he’s going to nick off a lot.
“For Australian conditions, I think Carberry is better suited than Root to opening. It’s also a better balanced side with Root at six rather than a struggling Bairstow.”
Warne might be evincing a bias towards his former county of Hampshire when he pushes Chris Tremlett to be England’s third seamer — “Rankin’s a bit raw and I don’t think Finn’s confidence is up after all his run-up issues” — but not when analysing Kevin Pietersen.
“You know he’s going to come out hard and play all his shots. When you’ve got the great players like Brian Lara and Sachin Tendulkar, you’ve just got to work hard on getting them under their average. If they don’t let him [Pietersen] get a hundred in the series, they’ll have done a pretty good job.”
So how would the greatest of all spinners, with the most astute cricket brain, bowl at Pietersen in the next two months — supposing he were to come out of retirement?
“I’d challenge him with spin when he first walks in and play on that bit of ego, and see if he wants to go downtown early.”
It is a fascinating prospect on two counts. First, if Pietersen goes downtown early, he might bump into Warne, still there from the night before.
Second, whereas everyone knew what the result of the last Ashes series was going to be, nobody can be sure this time
markysimmo
Johnny nice-tits
Sir Ian Botham has joined members of the England team in defending Alastair Cook following criticism from Shane Warne, describing the England captain as a "thorn in the side" of Australia.
Warne called Cook's tactics "boring and negative" and went on to claim his style of captaincy could cost England the Ashes.
"Cook can be negative, boring and not very imaginative," Warne said. "I don't like that style of captaincy.
"He needs to be more proactive. If Australia play well, and Cook continues to captain the way he does, I think he will lose the series."
However, Botham - speaking on his latest charity walk in Sri Lanka - laughed off Warne's comments and believes Australia should get their own house in order.
If it's not Warne, it's Glenn McGrath telling everyone they're going to win 5-0," the former England all-rounder told Sky Sports News. "It's all just a bit of friendly banter. I wouldn't expect anything else.
"Cook has been the biggest thorn in their side over the last few years, and he will continue to be in Australia.
"I think Australia should start looking at themselves because they've got problems of their own - they can't defend 360 in a one-day game (against India), not once but twice!
"I feel sorry for their batsmen - they get all the runs and then the bowlers get carted around the ground.
"Australia should look at their own back yard and not worry too much about ours."
James Anderson is one of several England players who have leapt to the defence of his skipper.
"The lads are really enjoying playing for him," he told Sky Sports News. "He leads from the front, leads by example and just drags everyone with him. His passion is there for everyone to see."
Matt Prior was another who was quick to give his backing to Cook.
"There's always going to be scrutiny and the captain, as the leader, is always going to come under fire," he said. 'Cooky' is a very strong person mentally and his record speaks for itself - and he's doing pretty well."
Jonathan Trott claimed Warne's comments were all part and parcel of an Ashes tour and that he was not taking them too seriously.
"There are seven hours to fill each day and five days - that's a lot of hours for people to talk and for players to get scrutinised. To win a series 3-0 - I don't think your tactics can be that bad.
"But I know there are people who think he's inept at it, but everyone in the changing room knows that he's well ahead of people in that department."
Former India cricket captain Sunil Gavaskar believes Cook will draw inspiration from his successful series in Australia two years ago.
"What Alastair Cook needs to do is to see how he's batted in Australia and then how he's batted in 2013.
"That way, he can find out a couple of areas he can improve on - he was maybe playing across or in front of his pads in England and therefore chasing deliveries which he wasn't doing in Australia.
"But if he gets off to a start in the first Test, gets a fluid 60 or 70 then he score another 500 runs plus this series."
Warne called Cook's tactics "boring and negative" and went on to claim his style of captaincy could cost England the Ashes.
"Cook can be negative, boring and not very imaginative," Warne said. "I don't like that style of captaincy.
"He needs to be more proactive. If Australia play well, and Cook continues to captain the way he does, I think he will lose the series."
However, Botham - speaking on his latest charity walk in Sri Lanka - laughed off Warne's comments and believes Australia should get their own house in order.
If it's not Warne, it's Glenn McGrath telling everyone they're going to win 5-0," the former England all-rounder told Sky Sports News. "It's all just a bit of friendly banter. I wouldn't expect anything else.
"Cook has been the biggest thorn in their side over the last few years, and he will continue to be in Australia.
"I think Australia should start looking at themselves because they've got problems of their own - they can't defend 360 in a one-day game (against India), not once but twice!
"I feel sorry for their batsmen - they get all the runs and then the bowlers get carted around the ground.
"Australia should look at their own back yard and not worry too much about ours."
James Anderson is one of several England players who have leapt to the defence of his skipper.
"The lads are really enjoying playing for him," he told Sky Sports News. "He leads from the front, leads by example and just drags everyone with him. His passion is there for everyone to see."
Matt Prior was another who was quick to give his backing to Cook.
"There's always going to be scrutiny and the captain, as the leader, is always going to come under fire," he said. 'Cooky' is a very strong person mentally and his record speaks for itself - and he's doing pretty well."
Jonathan Trott claimed Warne's comments were all part and parcel of an Ashes tour and that he was not taking them too seriously.
"There are seven hours to fill each day and five days - that's a lot of hours for people to talk and for players to get scrutinised. To win a series 3-0 - I don't think your tactics can be that bad.
"But I know there are people who think he's inept at it, but everyone in the changing room knows that he's well ahead of people in that department."
Former India cricket captain Sunil Gavaskar believes Cook will draw inspiration from his successful series in Australia two years ago.
"What Alastair Cook needs to do is to see how he's batted in Australia and then how he's batted in 2013.
"That way, he can find out a couple of areas he can improve on - he was maybe playing across or in front of his pads in England and therefore chasing deliveries which he wasn't doing in Australia.
"But if he gets off to a start in the first Test, gets a fluid 60 or 70 then he score another 500 runs plus this series."