I very rarely partake in these conversations but I enjoy lurking here because, depending on where you live, there's such a different perspective on these matters. For the sake of controversy, let me offer mine, as someone who spends a few months a year in Croatia and the rest of his time in Paris.
Last night, Macron said he wants to raise the military budget from 2.1 to 5% of the GDP. Good luck with that in a country where the deficit has been described as 'out of control' for two years in a row. Where is he going to take that money? Hospitals? Courts? Social Security? Poverty is rampant in France. A third of the inhabitants can't go to the dentist or have three meals a day. I'm sure they'd be willing to sacrifice even more to defend the borders of a country they couldn't care less about four years ago.
EU members are thus going to do the only thing they do when they have a problem: create more debt. Which was an easy way to deal with everything so long as Germany was bankrolling the whole thing but that is no longer the case and all the studies I've read so far are very pessimistic for Germany's model.
Now that we are effectively cut off Russia's (relatively) cheap energy, we heavily depend on other countries (US, Qatar, Saudi Arabia...) who, fortunately, are very nice and friendly.
The idea that Europe is stronger when it stands together is bogus. Some countries immensely benefit from it: Baltic States, for instance. But if you're French, what do you get out of it? EU apologists will answer 'access to a huge market of 550m customer' but that didn't make France any stronger over the past 40 years - far from it. It was just two countries (Germany and France) raising the standard of living in neighbouring countries in order develop their market. Unfortunately, one doesn't produce anything anymore and the other is finding out that its model doesn't work without access to cheap energy.
There would be a lot to say about the situation in Ukraine itself - even more so when you used to live in Yugoslavia... - but I think it's actually a moot point: at this stage, Europe can't do anything about it. Putin and Trump know it and that's why they didn't bother to invite anyone to the party. Last but not least, the fertility rate in France is 1,68 child/woman. Then you have a president that is so beloved that every time he takes a controversial decision, you're in for two weeks of civil unrest. I'm not sure parents would trust him with their kids' lives...
Again, don't read too much into it, even if it offends you - I just thought it'd be interesting to offer a slightly different point of view on that matter.