Just to add my tuppence worth, the crux of this "discussion" is centred around the intent/context element. A couple of analogies:
a) I am English, I live in Australia, if a stranger calls me a Pom I am not offended, if a stranger calls me a Pommie clam I reserve the right to be offended as he does not know whether I am a clam or not. The context of calling me a pom is perfectly acceptable (even though some ex-pats may not like it) as it is a general colloquialism taken to describe us. Calling me a Pommie clam would suggest an intent to offend me.
b) A person of Pakistan origin brought up in Australia will be called a Paki all his life, as a Lebanese will be called a Wog. The context again is not offensive or intended to offend as it is used in everyday language. I would expect a visiting Pakistani to maybe question the use of the term particularly if coming from a place where Paki is considered offensive, but would also expect them to be open to listening to why the intent is different to the understanding they may have.
It is all about education and understanding, and if I took exception at being called a Pom (or even a yid amongst my football mates) then I would either be in jail, or a politician.
I understand how JPBB can see the connotation of Aurier's words, but I cannot see how in isolation someone can be put through a kangaroo court and judged without taking into account all the facts, the context and the intention. It would not hurt Aurier to make some noise around the context/intent debate but I suspect he is being very carefully managed PR wise to ensure this doesn't become something bigger than it needs to be.
Last thing, JPBB you keep saying there are lots of Homophobes at Spurs and on this forum, however my experience of both (over many years) is that this is completely opposite of the people I have met/debated with. There is a big difference between being Homophobic and not agreeing with people who claim Homophobia is rife. There will always be a unsavoury element in any group or crowd and this is not limited to sport, take Parliament as a perfect representation of inherent bias and discrimination, however I am close to 100% certain that if any member on this board witnessed overt Homophobia at a game where the intent was to humiliate or discriminate they would be the first to defend the intended recipient.
I hope you can see this JPBB as that is the only way forward in this debate.