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Dating sites...

DHSF said:
Mate even getting a response I will consider a success.

To be honest there are some very cute women which would beg the question - why go on a dating site just to get men sending you emails "I see you n I live within five miles of each other, thats FIVE miles between sleeping alone or sleeping with your dream, thats FIVE miles between riding in ecstacy or fingerin yourself"
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Because women want to go for attention, chances are a lot of the women on there already have a guy but want to look for better. I text the woman I like more than anyone tonight, told her how much I think of her, she is the most amazing woman that I've ever known, she is funny, caring, passionate and if things don't happen with her, perhaps I will be resigned to the dating sites too. :(
 
El Guepardo said:
Because women want to go for attention, chances are a lot of the women on there already have a guy but want to look for better. I text the woman I like more than anyone tonight, told her how much I think of her, she is the most amazing woman that I've ever known, she is funny, caring, passionate and if things don't happen with her, perhaps I will be resigned to the dating sites too. :(
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This girl you like - she seein anyone?

Tld you about my story - the girl i liked, we have known each other for nearly three years, basically chose another guy over me as there was 'potential' in the relationship although the few weeks beforehand we hung out frequently, talked everyday and she told me, on her own free will, that she really really liked me.

When she told me she chose another guy - well... that was the last time we have spoken and will ever speak or see each other again - a couple of months back - kills like mad but fudge it.
 
Not as far as I know she isn't. I have known her for years but in spite of us being close, nothing has happened.

I hate it when you care for a woman so deeply and it goes to fudge. You always question should life be different but what really can be done different? You live your life, you do what you think is right and perhaps if it doesn't go to plan then it was never meant to go to plan?

I think you will talk to that woman again. I think that we all make a break from people we care about to protect ourselves, but, if she liked you that much and you liked her, then perhaps there might be a chance in future.
 
El Guepardo said:
Not as far as I know she isn't. I have known her for years but in spite of us being close, nothing has happened.

I hate it when you care for a woman so deeply and it goes to fudge. You always question should life be different but what really can be done different? You live your life, you do what you think is right and perhaps if it doesn't go to plan then it was never meant to go to plan?

I think you will talk to that woman again. I think that we all make a break from people we care about to protect ourselves, but, if she liked you that much and you liked her, then perhaps there might be a chance in future.
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Mate - she may very well not be seeing anyone but girls have a way of disguising things, she isnt obligated to tell you cos youre not an item and youre not an exclusive item at that.

You gotta make a move dude. Trust me one thing i have learnt is to regret the things you have done and dont live with regretting the things you wanted to do but didnt.

Youre bein too sensible - you need to be sexual dude. seriously. I am assuming alot but ive been on both ends of the spectrum, the one befriending a girl and the one being befriended.
 
I have told her how I feel by text, there's not much more I can do to make a move until tomorrow.

I have told her before and as far as I am concerned, I will tell her every day if I thought it would make things happen as I think she is the most suitable woman for me that I have ever met. She has good banter, she is funny, she and me connect like I couldn't have imagined. I think it's rare you connect with someone as well as I do with her. I just want her to give us a chance, see what can happen. If things don't work out then, fair enough, but without giving us a try then how can she really know?

And, as for the sexual side, that goes upon women you meet for the first few times, rather than women you have known for a long time. Don't get me wrong, you can still want sex with those that you have known for years but it's not necessarily the first thing that you think of. I would be happy with her if I could spend some good time, me and her on the sofa just chatting and whilst sex would be good, it isn't the be all and end all, it is just part of what would make us work.
 
El Guepardo said:
I have told her how I feel by text, there's not much more I can do to make a move until tomorrow.

I have told her before and as far as I am concerned, I will tell her every day if I thought it would make things happen as I think she is the most suitable woman for me that I have ever met. She has good banter, she is funny, she and me connect like I couldn't have imagined. I think it's rare you connect with someone as well as I do with her. I just want her to give us a chance, see what can happen. If things don't work out then, fair enough, but without giving us a try then how can she really know?

And, as for the sexual side, that goes upon women you meet for the first few times, rather than women you have known for a long time. Don't get me wrong, you can still want sex with those that you have known for years but it's not necessarily the first thing that you think of. I would be happy with her if I could spend some good time, me and her on the sofa just chatting and whilst sex would be good, it isn't the be all and end all, it is just part of what would make us work.
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Rule 1 - never do it by text and never tell a girl you like her. then again I cant talk or give advice cos when this girl told me she really liked me all I said in return, when she asked me whether i liked her three times, was "youre a cool girl i enjoy your company" when infact I liked her like mad. It was my decision to cut off contact, when she told me she was gonna continue seeing this guy I basically said well thats that been good knowing you... bye.

Im not sayin have sex with her i guess im sayin be flirty, dont be scared about tellin her that you casually datin someone, tell her you gonna cook for this girl etc - all in a casual context not in a try hard way but yeah ultimately, it is all a bit of a game. Anyways there is a thread on this which I think I started but someone else also started (cos GG is full of lonesome men haha)

Go on Match - ya never know. also you could be better lookin than me and have waaaaay more success
 
To coin a cliche 'at the end of the day', if you tell a woman you like her, doing it by text simply gives her more time to collect her thoughts and give you a reply. I am happy to tell a woman I like her, partly because I don't like game play, I like being out in the open and seeing what she thinks. If you hide your feelings, who is to say that she won't go for someone else because you didn't take that chance of expressing yourself?

It's all well and good playing games, so she questions how you feel but surely that only goes so far? Until you realise that she is worth opening up to?

And like you said, if you step back, you step back from being the one that might be dating her. I do think that you and I share similar opinions with regards to women, who is nice etc, but I do think that you need to be more open sometimes with women and perhaps I less so. We should find that happy medium.
 
without wanting to sound like an arse - grow a pair both of ya.

if you like someone, tell them. whats the worst that can happen?

you come with nothing, you leave with nothing....what you lost? noooooooothing
 
I did tell her how much I think of her. If she decides that she doesn't want to know, it's her loss and not mine ultimately.
 
nah, you may as well post it here and send her the link

pick up the phone, say hi
tell her how much you enjoy being around her and you cant wait to see her next - she will hear how your voice is all warm and genuine about the thought of being around her and she'll be smitten

you cant do all that in a text - nothing like good tone and bit of well used silence ;-)
 
Totally agree - even in person is better. Both are more sincere, texts are a bit meh! Girls want a 'man' not a 'kid' hiding behind a text screen.
 
DHSF said:
Progress after one day - and yeah I put a photo up

113 emails i have sent all day

I have had one wink
One email sayin it wont work out
and another saying im too young

on the plus side - theyre all fudged in the head
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Your gonna need photos.. unfortunately its the only thing people are interested in online.
 
Spursman said:
Your gonna need photos.. unfortunately its the only thing people are interested in online.
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Thats the problem isnt it - relying on looks more than anything else.

I hate online dating. If I was Gods gift to women in the looks dept, although I am in the bed dept, I would still be tinkled off. I would rather chat to the girl and then I decide whether she is worth my time.
 
DHSF said:
Thats the problem isnt it - relying on looks more than anything else.

I hate online dating. If I was Gods gift to women in the looks dept, although I am in the bed dept, I would still be tinkled off. I would rather chat to the girl and then I decide whether she is worth my time.
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you wouldnt approach a girl in a bar etc. in you didnt think she was attractive though would you?

internet dating certainly can be a bit more throw away i agree, but there is where some basic profile information comes into play.

in a bar/club you have no idea at all if the other person has even a remote interest in similar things to you and that can take ages to find out.

im talking as someone that met my now wife on semi-dating site (a pre-facebook version of facebook), and i always see dating/social networking sites as like a pub/club but without the BS.

i agree about people only going on looks, but if someone doesnt reply to you/doesnt message you because they only think you look "ok" and that is a problem for them, then that says enough about their personality for it to be a bullet dodged for you

i guess the only bit of advice i would give re; dating sites is - dont expect it to be some magic gateway where you suddenly find the one. that will take time, just like it would "in the real world". but you get to widen the net, talk to people you would NEVER have even known existed.

my now wife was living two counties away and was in the UK from the US for a short time - there is no chance our paths would have crossed. none. but they did. yeah, on second thought........8)
 
monkeybarry said:
you wouldnt approach a girl in a bar etc. in you didnt think she was attractive though would you?

internet dating certainly can be a bit more throw away i agree, but there is where some basic profile information comes into play.

in a bar/club you have no idea at all if the other person has even a remote interest in similar things to you and that can take ages to find out.

im talking as someone that met my now wife on semi-dating site (a pre-facebook version of facebook), and i always see dating/social networking sites as like a pub/club but without the BS.

i agree about people only going on looks, but if someone doesnt reply to you/doesnt message you because they only think you look "ok" and that is a problem for them, then that says enough about their personality for it to be a bullet dodged for you

i guess the only bit of advice i would give re; dating sites is - dont expect it to be some magic gateway where you suddenly find the one. that will take time, just like it would "in the real world". but you get to widen the net, talk to people you would NEVER have even known existed.

my now wife was living two counties away and was in the UK from the US for a short time - there is no chance our paths would have crossed. none. but they did. yeah, on second thought........8)
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)

Ok let me rephrase my initial point - people are basing it on not looks but photos - be it one or two or 10. Some people are photogenic some people arent, some people look great in photos some arent. When I go to a bar I am not seeing a snapshot of a girl i.e. 1 or 2 millisecond of her situation but seeing how she walks, how she is presented, acting, smiling joking etc.

Monkey - I made the initial point about a profile. Surely the whole fun and point of dating is actually finding out about someone and not just seeing it as whether they 'tick your boxes'. Im kind of a romantic in that way, I wanna find out for myself what she is like, what her interests are etc not find out everything about her just by her ticks int he boxes. It takes away from the excitement, the unexpectancy, the mystery and ultimately the fun.

Im not on the lookout for the one, im more just lets see how things develop but after I get those feelings would i think about it that way.

Glad its worked out for you and im not dismissing it because it obviously works as evidenced by the success of these sites and I guess if youre home one night you may aswell go on it and try it. I wouldnt use datign sites as my only source of women because I dont think it is for me.
 
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