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Serious favour needed for tomorrow

Danishfurniturelover

Danishfurniturelover

the prettiest spice girl
Does anyone have a baby or toddler they can give to me to pose on a boat in Hyde Park and then also a picture outside the British museum.

2 hours max and I will give you 500 quid. No weird stuff just take a picture with it. Can be a boy or girl but has to be white, mixed race at a push but that might be a harder story to sell.

I'm serious not even watching the game tonight. Stuck in fcuking Portsmouth, GHod I hate this city. Seriously pm if you can help a yid out.
 
I'm really looking forward to hearing more about this. Sadly my kids are too old and not in London.
 
It’s times like these I wish I had a kid. But then I realise that if i’m considering a lump sum offer of cash to loan that kid even to someone as balanced and reputable as our beloved DGL for photo shoots in various tourist locations, then it may be for the best I don’t have one for now.
 
Can only speak for myself but I do feel a bit of context / backstory / how it all panned out is a must. If for any reason, perhaps some justification as to why you had to miss a thoroughly enjoyable NLD!!!
 
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Due to a recent change in responsibilities at work, it's been put upon me to audit recent local news stories and I must say looking at the dates in question I was a tad worried when this one was put on my desk. This can't be what I think it is right?

12th May, 2022 - Sam Somersby reporting for the Evening Standard - http:www.standard.co.uk/news/london-hyde-park-disturbance-hg3845

A man has been taken in to custody for attempting to pay a sum of money to rent a human child for a "touristic photography project" at a children's activity centre in Hyde Park. The allegedly manic malefactor propositioned numerous caregivers with infants up until the authorities were notified.

One local witness explained: "I wasn't sure what to think, whatever was going on it seemed like despite his immediate predicament, he had some real resentment towards Portsmouth as well as missing the north London derby, the way he worked those points in to his case was quite convincing but ultimately the custard stained nylons were his downfall..."

A BBC spokesperson stated "Whilst the request was unorthodox, the man explicitly stated that the ethnic origin of the baby wasn't paramount despite it potentially causing more difficulties, so at least it was a win for diversity, that's got to count for something."

In the social media sphere, Piers Morgan reportedly weighed in to the case in his typical no nonsense approach - "What is the world coming to? If you clearly state the race of the baby is unimportant and you still can't ask a stranger to hire sed baby for artistic pursuit, then isn't that proof that political correctness has simply gone too far!?"

Might need another GG whip round for Legal fees, although it may be a tougher gig than Amber Heard's lot.
 
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