Are you seriously suggesting that Manu's many great successes over the years under Ferguson were due them moaning and fouling? If it was that easy everyone would be doing it. In fact most are, and what you describe is what happens up and down the country in all football grounds.
A complete and absolute commitment to winning, which is maybe what you are getting at, starts with playing successful football.
Man U succeeded because coming out second best from a 50:50 challenge was absolutely shameful to them. Letting an opponent foul one of your players without getting your own back on said opponent was unacceptable to them. Looking away and walking away when someone stamps on your team-mate's head (as Modric did when Balotelli slyly stepped on Parker two years ago) would have been unthinkable to them. Trudging backwards, resignedly accepting a yellow card as it is shoved in your face by a strutting referee would have been outrageous to them. Walking down the tunnel crying man-tears after losing 6-0 and then saying 'Oh, we're so very sorry' on the official website two days later would have been frankly inconceivable to them. Gaining absolutely no motivation from one of the opposition players in a big derby game gleefully signalling '2-0' as he is stretchered off would have been shocking to them. Letting the referee get away with a contentious call without having five players running at him snarling and yelling while the manager went purple with rage and the crowd roared their anger would have been detestable to them.
A desire to never, ever lose even a single 50:50, a desire to stand up for your team-mates in every circumstance, a desire to hound and pressure and scare the referee into believing that there would be an almighty ****-storm coming his way should he dare to penalise one of your lads, a desire to leave your mark on the opposition, a desire to achieve the three points by any means necessary, a desire to never be put in a situation where the media laughs at you, the fans are ashamed of you, the manager is sacked because of you, and all you can do is apologize.........these are the things that got United winning.
Sure, you can simplify that by calling it a 'complete and absolute commitment to winning', but it goes far deeper than that. It is, consciously or otherwise, an all-consuming desire to be a part of a team that strikes fear into everyone they face, and to make absolutely sure that anyone who harms you either as an individual or as a team, be it the referee or the opposition, never, ever escapes unscathed. I'm not sure what you'd call that, but that is what made United win. You could see it: raw passion.
Today, Arsenal derived motivation from facing us, a rival who they quite clearly will do anything to beat. We,by contrast, derived little extra motivation from facing them that we did not already have when facing any other side. They wanted it more. We arguably didn't. And we paid the price. That needs to change, and starting by hounding the referee (something we've been historically reluctant to do) would be a decent way to instill that 'us against them' mentality within the lads.