When was your last punch up

[Danishfurniturelover]

Well i feel more calm today then i did at the weekend. I must say that at times i do get wound up quite easily.

Things that really annoy me are not stuff like tottenham losing, i never got that upset by sporting result, sad sometimes but never violent. But when people try to get on a train before letting me get off, well i could quite happily rip there heads off there shoulders.

Think i need to find out why little things seem to get on my nerves so much. The wife says i have to look into myself because im not angry with others but myself. I do not get it though, because if im jogging round the park and some dingdong can not keep his dog under control, im not angry with myself, im angry for them for not allowing me to jog in piece and quiet.

 

[Golfball]

Are you asking a question or making a statement? Tough to tell...

It looks like a statement, with a question mark to get your opinion on whether you agree or not.

I'm guessing that dog owner thought that it was your son with the problem so he shouldnt have to do something different. But thats pet owners for you. You should have mentioned it and waited for the dog to come near you before the massive over reaction.

 

[Danishfurniturelover]

It looks like a statement, with a question mark to get your opinion on whether you agree or not.

I'm guessing that dog owner thought that it was your son with the problem so he shouldnt have to do something different. But thats pet owners for you. You should have mentioned it and waited for the dog to come near you before the massive over reaction.

pet owners are one of the biggest groups i have problems with, from the ****s that have cats that poo in my garden to the dog owners who talk and treat there dogs like are humans, that is there right if they want to. But im always being told how we have to take responsibility for our actions these days. If this is so keep your fudging dog from sniffing my balls when im sat at an outdoor cafe and barking at my heels when im jogging.

 

[raboner]

Well i feel more calm today then i did at the weekend. I must say that at times i do get wound up quite easily.

Things that really annoy me are not stuff like tottenham losing, i never got that upset by sporting result, sad sometimes but never violent. But when people try to get on a train before letting me get off, well i could quite happily rip there heads off there shoulders.

Think i need to find out why little things seem to get on my nerves so much. The wife says i have to look into myself because im not angry with others but myself. I do not get it though, because if im jogging round the park and some dingdong can not keep his dog under control, im not angry with myself, im angry for them for not allowing me to jog in piece and quiet.

sexual frustration.. or according to popular research, people who are easily angered generally have really small ****s.

 

[NW5pur]

according to Derren Brown this is the best way to deal with aggressive behaviour:‎

This is simply about not engaging with your aggressor at the level they expect. I was coming back from a hotel at about 3am one night and there was a guy in the street with his girlfriend. He was really drunk, clearly looking for a fight and he started kicking off at me. I had a routine ready in my head for this sort of situation and it worked a treat on this occasion. He asked me that typical aggressive rhetorical question — “Do you want a fight?” You can’t say “yes” or “no” — you’ll get hit either way. So, I responded with, “The wall outside my house is four-feet high.”

I didn’t engage at the level he was expecting me to, so immediately he was on the back foot. He came back with, “What?” and I repeated my bizarre response. I delivered the line in a completely matter-of-fact tone, as if he was the one who was missing something here. Suddenly, he was confused. All his adrenaline had dropped away, because I’d pulled the rug from under him. It’s the verbal version of a martial-arts technique called an ‘adrenaline dump’, whereby you get the person to relax before you hit them. A punch will have much greater impact if the recipient’s guard is down. I stuck to this surreal conversational thread with my assailant, saying things like, “I lived in Spain for a while and the walls are really huge, but in this country they’re tiny.” After a few of these exchanges, he just went, “Oh f*ck!” and broke down in tears. The guy had all this adrenaline and was on the point of really laying into me — I was seeing myself beaten to a bloody pulp — but these non-threatening nonsense statements broke that aggression down and he genuinely started crying. I ended up sitting next to him on the kerb, comforting him. It’s the same with guys that come up and ask to “have a look at your phone”, and you end up handing over your stuff and hating yourself for doing it — you can use the same approach. My PA had some stuff nicked in a Tube station recently, and I said to him, “If you’d just starting singing, they would have left you alone.”

some other funny examples of how to overcome lifes awkward situations here - http://www.shortlist.com/entertainment/derren-browns-guide-to-overcoming-awkward-situations

love the bus seat one but doubt i'd ever have the guts to do it!

 

[Danishfurniturelover]

sexual frustration.. or according to popular research, people who are easily angered generally have really small ****s.

sexual frustration, the are some days i have some issues with a kinkier side to my personality. I believe some of my desires to be wrong and immoral and it takes a lot of energy to suppress these urges. It is often on these days i get annoyed quickly so maybe the is something in that.

 

[Park Lane James]

Last fight I had was about 6 months ago. Was out in a club with my mates and some bloke said I kept on bumping into him (which I wasn't), started getting aggy towards me and whatnot. He gave e a shove and dropped his hands down so i clocked him. Managed to get in a few punches before it got broken up - I got hit on the nose and it bled everywhere. Anyway i told the bouncers that he started everything and he spent the night in a cell. Oh well.

But I generally try to avoid violence - I do get a bit lairy after a few beers which can be a problem though. In these days you don't know what someone might pull out on you so I'd rather just avoid confrontation. I'm 6 foot 3 so I generally don't get much hassle because of it.

I'm doing MMA at the moment, so I can defend myself if I need to. Great workout as well

 

[thfcsteff]

It looks like a statement, with a question mark to get your opinion on whether you agree or not.

I'm guessing that dog owner thought that it was your son with the problem so he shouldnt have to do something different. But thats pet owners for you. You should have mentioned it and waited for the dog to come near you before the massive over reaction.

I'm a pet owner. This guy was a complete, and utter, arsehole. Several people came up to me afterwards and thanked me, they said he was almost a 'bully' at this cafe. It was a long time ago now mate. BTW, the dog had already jumped up on my son, which at that time put the dog's tongue in direct contact with his head. I HAD asked quite nicely before, a couple of times.

The TRUTH is, what I should've done is pick Zak up and walked away/not got involved. Alas I let myself down in the sense of reacting, but sometimes a situation demands some action. Since then, I focussed greatly on not letting 'moments' annoy me/become about me. I read a fantastic book called City Dharma by Arthur Jeon, where he basically points out all the places that wasted negative energy comes into our day, and how to de-personalize it so as it's not about us and also to focus very much on realizing that the past has happened and that it's how you move forward from anything which has happened that helps your day/time go well or not. He understands angry reactions, and agrees that sometimes they will happen, but generally points people towards a positive future action. Brilliant book. Been my mental companion for over a decade, and also helps me when it come to recognizing that not everyone on this planet is decent, nice or even polite!

 

[spasm]

i am flaccid..

 

[AuroRaman]

I'm a pet owner. This guy was a complete, and utter, arsehole. Several people came up to me afterwards and thanked me, they said he was almost a 'bully' at this cafe. It was a long time ago now mate. BTW, the dog had already jumped up on my son, which at that time put the dog's tongue in direct contact with his head. I HAD asked quite nicely before, a couple of times.

The TRUTH is, what I should've done is pick Zak up and walked away/not got involved. Alas I let myself down in the sense of reacting, but sometimes a situation demands some action. Since then, I focussed greatly on not letting 'moments' annoy me/become about me. I read a fantastic book called City Dharma by Arthur Jeon, where he basically points out all the places that wasted negative energy comes into our day, and how to de-personalize it so as it's not about us and also to focus very much on realizing that the past has happened and that it's how you move forward from anything which has happened that helps your day/time go well or not. He understands angry reactions, and agrees that sometimes they will happen, but generally points people towards a positive future action. Brilliant book. Been my mental companion for over a decade, and also helps me when it come to recognizing that not everyone on this planet is decent, nice or even polite!

It should be standard criteria for every poster on this forum to read that book!

 

[thfcsteff]

It should be standard criteria for every poster on this forum to read that book!

Ah ha! Superb! You are obviously a fan too.
I never, ever thought books like that held anything, but when I saw how non-judgemental he was about anger and frustration, plus the absolutely clear, common-sense and brilliant advice he gave on how to not just move on from things but prevent matters from getting under your skin in the first place, I was a hooked. He is someone who'd hand I would like to shake, as often I refer to what I read in his book. I re-read it every few years. He's also not one of those 'serial-gurus' who has become an industry. Two books!

In fact, you've inspired me to post a link...


http://www.amazon.co.uk/City-Dharma-Guide-Stress-Free-Living/dp/0749925337/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1348026266&sr=8-1

 

[markysimmo]

Well i feel more calm today then i did at the weekend. I must say that at times i do get wound up quite easily.

No point mate, Ive made a real effort the past 2 months to not get so stressed at little things, its worked, im a lot calmer person now and feel better for it...

 

[markysimmo]

i am flaccid..

i am spartacus

 

[Boonie]

No I'm Spartacus!

 

[raboner]

no im flacid!

 

[Gordinho]

Problem with the younger generation is they are to ****y and they do not seem to get into fights anymore unless it in there 40 pound a month gyms when they do a kickboxing class.

Oi grandad, when you use phrases like the one above you're automatically too old to be fighting in the street.

You're safer knocking out aging rock gods.

 

[Jammy]

Not had a fight since I was at school. I'm big enough at 6'3" and 16 stone that people don't bother me, but not so big, unlike my mate Nick at 6'7" and 20 stone, that the tiny drunk bloke will pick a fight.

 

[spasm]

flaccid is ...as flaccid does